Author: Tanja Ajtic, Serbia/Canada

Loneliness

Thin is the connection between
all those who were and were not, vague.
Relying on the ideals of the past,
I spread the story of imperfection.
I call my exes for salvation,
and I feel the coldness of the earthen wall.
Don’t tell me what to do,
loneliness is biting my toenails.
Not about poise, because I’m going to start
begging for friendship.
The corpse pushed me into oblivion of my path.
And there is no more place for me in any horde.
I am alone.
Don’t tell me anything, you can’t help me because
it’s a dark world in which he struggles.
My nights are sad.
All my former and forgotten things and stories.
All my former and forgotten friends, are gone.
Unknown faces are walking the streets,
where I don’t recognize anyone from the past,
and I knew quite a few of them.
At the familiar name, a spark in my heart ignites,
and I remember everything that was.
And I remain alone with despair, if I could.
But I didn’t.
Forgotten for years.
Buried in four walls, in four white walls,
in the square, at the intersection of the tearful streets
and the weeping sky.
You come to the infinity of dissatisfaction.
I hear the blunt impact of the skull against the white wall.
It doesn’t hurt.
I struggle with the fog and in the murky water of time.
Will I die alone or will I sprout?